Love is Not Manly
by uchiha.s
Summary: Neji had sworn to himself that he'd never fall in love. Not because he feared being hurt, or hurting the loved one—not at all. No, it was mainly because he didn't want to look like a freaking moron. NejiTen NO LONGER ON HIATUS
1. The Fall

Love is Not Manly

Summary: Neji had sworn to himself that he'd never fall in love. Not because he feared being hurt, or hurting the loved one—not at all. No, it was mainly because he didn't want to look like a freaking moron. [NejiTen

A/N: This was SUPPOSED to be a oneshot, I swear. But it just grew and grew and now it's multichaptered. I must be high on the painkillers I'm on (got my wisdom teeth out today.)

I'm going to do everything possible to keep it at three chapters. Yay, short and sweet! I'm not a natural at Neji/Ten so PLEASE review and tell me what I could do better.

Chapter One: The Fall

--

Neji had sworn to himself that he'd never fall in love. Not because he feared being hurt, or hurting the loved one—not at all. No, it was mainly because he didn't want to look like a freaking moron.

Example one: his good friend Sasuke. Extremely focused young man climbing the corporate ladder, slowly saving up enough money to finally hire a decent lawyer to put his monstrosity of a brother in jail. But then a pink-haired little twit of a secretary came along and now where was Sasuke? A ring on his finger (how mortifying) and grazing on some exotic beach with said pink-haired twit. Quest abandoned and suddenly content with his high-paying job.

Example two: three of his friends (though he still didn't know why he was friends with these idiots), Kiba, Naruto, and Shino, all chasing after Neji's own cousin, Hinata. No longer good friends thanks to the competition, and all had gone all but bankrupt trying to buy Hinata's affection. (It wasn't working)

Example three: probably the only sensible one left of Neji's friends, Shikamaru, caught between two insanely violent women fighting for his love. And he was still trying to decide which one he liked.

And there were so many more examples of idiotic behavior, all due to a simple chemical reaction within their bodies. So undignified. Yes, Neji had concluded that falling in love was just not worth the embarrassment. Besides, there was always the issue that there was most likely not a woman on earth that would put up with all of his crap. Destiny or not, Neji was never going to participate in any sort of mating ritual.

But what Neji didn't know was that falling in love is just that—falling. Sasuke, if presented with the choice, would _never_ have fallen for his new secretary, Sakura. Not in a million years. In fact, he denied his own feelings successfully for two years before finally breaking down and admitting to himself and Sakura that he'd _fallen_ in love. And Kiba, Naruto, and Shino certainly wouldn't have chosen to all fall in love with the same woman. They would never have wanted anything to ruin their close friendship. And yet here they were, nearly battling for Hinata. And Shikamaru probably would have loved to just be able to choose between Temari and Ino—or better yet, not have to deal with them at all.

Falling in love is an accident that escalates, and once it happened to Neji, there was nothing he could do to stop the fall.

--

"Geez Neji, you hold on to cash tighter than Sasuke!"

Neji merely glowered at his blond friend and, with hands trembling in fury, accepted the minimal amount of cash dispensed from the ATM. Why was he here again? He shot a glance at his cousin, Hinata. Or rather where he assumed she was. He couldn't see her, on account of the three idiots crooning over the young woman. Oh, that's right. He was supposed to be protecting her from those imbeciles.

Depositing the meager currency in his wallet, Neji turned to the new task at hand: somehow managing to make sure Hinata wasn't 'accidentally' molested whilst navigating through the formidable crowd. He gnashed his teeth as he prodded Naruto in the back. He hated the circus, he hated spending money, and he especially hated doing favors for people. All in all, this day was sucking harder than a baby on its bottle and it technically hadn't started yet.

Finally they found their seats—Naruto and Kiba effectively sitting on each other's laps, and Shino on the other side of Hinata—and Neji had elected to sit two seats away from the herd of buffoons. If anyone asked, he'd never seen any of them in his entire life (never mind the disturbing resemblance he bore to Hinata). The lights in the tent darkened and Neji stiffened at the annoying sounds of popcorn crunching in people's mouths and the sounds of soda slurping. That was yet another reason to not attend these ridiculous events: the _sounds._ Too much noise.

There was booming applause as a pretty—well, fine, _beautiful—_young woman danced out into the ring. Apparently she was the knife thrower. Neji snickered. An abominable profession. Hopefully the woman was suitably embarrassed by her quack of a job.

He winced as she threw the first knife at a young man who looked like he was being Sasuke for Halloween and had done a fairly decent job. The knife glinted as it whoosed through the air, hitting the board behind the Sasuke-clone with a satisfying splintering sound. It must have been millimetres from his bare chest.

Neji glanced around to make sure no one was watching and then squinted to better study the woman. She was—and Neji swore he'd never use this word _ever_ again—cute. Short, in fact barely above five foot two. Curvy, and slight on top. She was wearing a red satin and gold sequin costume, horrifyingly intriguing with its skin-tight bodice and itty-bitty skirt. She had nice legs too, Neji noted. Her hair was tied into buns and she had bright, big chestnut eyes, and a small red mouth.

Before she threw the final knife, she turned to the audience, winking with a teasing little smile. Neji's knuckles bleached as his grip tightened on the edge of his chair. He needed to get out of here. He realized he was having what was probably the most mortifying natural reaction to the pretty knife-thrower.

This had _never_ happened before.

He stood up and stormed out of the tent, cheeks apple red. Hinata would have to suffer. He refused to endure _that._

--

"NEJI! I am SO glad to see you! This is excellent! So, I was just having a wonderfully rejuvenating massage, and Naruto and I came to the conclusion that you need to get out more. I have this lovely lady-friend--"

"No."

"And-"

"Go away."

"She's very funny--"

"I hate funny women."

"And pretty--"

"Do you want me to rip out your intestines and feed them to the birds?" Neji hissed, standing up from his desk and leaning forward across it, resting his palms on it. Lee didn't get the point, instead opting to stand up and pace the room. Disgusted, he picked up one of the many emptied styrofoam coffee cups on Neji's desk.

"Neji, I _do_ believe that your sullen and antisocial behavior is merely due to an unhealthy diet consisting of highly acidic foods that will earn you a bleeding stomach ulcer--"

"No worse an effect than when I have to deal with you--" Neji glowered at his health-nut coworker. Lee continued, undaunted.

"--As well as depression, migraines, and irritability. If you would at least put a bit of milk in your coffee, you might..."

Neji stopped listening as Lee went on, pacing back and forth in front of his desk, gesturing and talking with his eyes closed in the blissfully ignorant condescension that was a marked trait of Lee and always had been. Neji cursed the day he had chosen to sit with him at lunch when he'd seen the idiot sitting alone. He'd heard that the woman Lee had been madly in love with (so he said, these were not terms Neji would _ever_ use) had actually been the same one that had recently married Sasuke, and obviously this meant Lee would never have the woman.

Neji hadn't felt _bad,_ per se. It was just that Lee looked notably pathetic, in his oddly green three piece suit and tragic haircut and eyebrows. Clearly, Lee was _yet another_ example of how pathetic women made men look. Neji prided himself on being the only truly dignified and manly one left. He wasn't going to give that up, not to some lady-friend of Lee's, anyway. Any woman willing to befriend Mr. Caterpillar-brows had to either be blind or obscenely desperate.

"...and furthermore, the effect that bananas have on one's colon--"

"Are you done yet?"

Lee looked a bit punctured, but he merely sighed. "I suppose so. However, I _insist_ that you accompany us tonight. Sakura and Sasuke have returned--"

"Lee, I do not _care_ if you're not capable of seeing her--"

"This isn't _about_ me, Neji." Lee sighed, for the first time looking truly angry. "Everyone thinks that you're... well, withdrawing into the confines of your miserable soul. You are _depressed,_ Neji. Everyone can see it. And you're lonely as well. Just come out with us tonight." Lee frowned, his dark brown eyes pleading. Neji stood up, stormed around his desk, and began hauling Lee out of his office.

"If you give your word that you will let me work, I will meet this so-called friend of yours. Failure to uphold your end of the deal will result in the dissolution of the contract. Understood?" Neji sneered. Lee nodded.

"Wow, Neji, you should have been a lawyer!"

"Too much dealing with people. Now GO!"

He rather violently slammed the door, sighing with something as close as he could muster to happiness, but froze when there was a knock on the door.

"Neji-"

"I TOLD YOU--"

"Just meet us at seven o'clock at the Hyperbola. You can look it up on the internet. Bye!"

Neji glowered at the closed door, but deigned to look it up on the computer, stabbing the keys on the keyboard as hard as he could with pure, uniquely-Neji unadulterated fury.

It was going to be a _long_ fucking night.

--

"Oh my god! It was _magical, _wasn't it, Sasuke-kun? A perfect honeymoon. The lagoon, I must say, was the best part, though for some reason Sasuke really liked our bungalow!"

Neji made eye contact with Sasuke, who returned the look with a death glare. Neji raised his eyebrows, but said nothing more.

He couldn't even bear to drink whatever the hell Naruto had ordered for him, on two counts: one, it had something to do with apples, and there was a little pink umbrella. As a rule, Neji did not drink anything that had a little pink umbrella in it. Two, Sasuke and Sakura were so mushy it was impossible to be around. Sakura wasn't even an especially attractive woman! The sight of them turned Neji's stomach, and by the pained look of feigned ecstasy on Lee's face, he was having a similar reaction.

Also, Lee's "lady friend" was late. Very late. Forty-five minutes late, in fact. Lee explained that his friend didn't have a cell phone. Neji snorted. Who the hell in this day and age didn't have a cell phone? She must practically be on welfare, he thought as he gazed out the small window at the city street in the night, lit up and beautiful.

He felt silly now; he'd been nervous for nothing. The fact that he was nervous proved his point about women and for a short time, he felt self-righteous and satisfied.

And yet... and yet a small part of him had really wanted to meet her.

He remembered the girl at the circus, the knife-thrower. It was all her fault, he concluded. She'd put him in a state about women, and now he was acted ludicrous over some obviously poor woman that he'd never even met, and by the way things looked, probably wouldn't ever meet.

But all of a sudden, Lee and Sakura and Hinata were waving happily at someone behind Neji.

"Tenten! I was so worried about you! You know how dangerous it is for an attractive woman like yourself to be wandering--"

"Yeah yeah, I was fine, Lee. I'm a _knife_ thrower, remember?"

Neji froze. Slowly he turned to see a woman striding confidently their way. Petite curvy figure? Check. Beautiful brown eyes? Check. Shiny brunette hair twisted into—admittedly--adorable buns? Check. And knife-throwing profession? Check, obviously.

Her cheeks were rosy from the chilly night air, and probably from hurrying. Strands of her hair had come out of the buns, but instead of looking messy, it looked even more artfully arranged. So he couldn't fault her there. She was wearing exactly the right amount of makeup, not too little, not too much. Damn, he couldn't fault her there either. She was wearing a rather shapeless sweater that must have once been pink, and loose jeans. Her clothing may have been drab, but obviously the girl was poor. At least she wasn't following the trend that other women in the club seemed to cling to: skin-tight shiny halter tops in wild, tropic colors, and insanely tight jeans and open-toed heels. They looked ridiculous! It was _cold. _Not the height of summer.

Conclusively, she was as perfect as possible.

She casually kissed Lee on the cheek and hugged Hinata and Sakura, and waved to everyone else before sitting down. Neji managed a slight nod in her direction, although he doubted she had even realized he was there.

"Can I get you anything to drink, Tenten?" Kiba asked enthusiastically, scooching closer to her around the table. Tenten gave a blasé wave of her tiny hand.

"Nah, I'll just get a diet coke. I'm not much of a drinker, you know that!" She laughed, brown eyes sparkling.

Dammit. Yet _another_ fault she didn't have.

The group settled into enthusiastic chatter, with Neji left out completely. For all of Lee's talk about getting him out, they seemed to forget he was there.

After two hours of dejectedly watching Tenten, Neji had had enough. He stood up.

"Where are you going, Neji? We like just got here!" Naruto yelled above the pumping techno music that was hurting Neji's head.

"Home." He grumbled. But he caught Tenten's eye and she smiled. Neji prayed he wasn't blushing.

"Wait! Neji, where do you live?" Lee grabbed onto the sleeve of Neji's coat to halt him. Neji scowled.

"North Konoha, by the art museum." He snapped, struggling out of Lee's surprisingly tight grip.

"That's great, you can take Tenten home then! I don't want her out in the dark by herself. It's so dangerous!" Lee said earnestly. Tenten blushed and waved her hands.

"Don't worry, um..."

"Neji." He said. Tenten laughed bashfully.

"Right, _Neji_, don't worry about me. Seriously. I'm a big girl, I can _take care of myself._" She glared at Lee as she said this pointedly. Lee frowned.

"Well, still, I _insist_. Besides Neji, could you really live with yourself, knowing you let a beautiful and very likely to be targeted woman walk home, so late at night?" His eyes were doing that sparkly-puppy dog thing again. Sasuke snorted.

"Yes, he could very easily." He smirked. Sakura scowled and hit Sasuke, but right away melted and apologized. Neji rolled his eyes.

"Since it's _such a big deal,_ I will take you home, Tenten. But I'm leaving now." He began walking away, and heard scrambling as Tenten hopped over seats to follow Neji out of the club.

Outside, it was freezing, as clearly indicated by Tenten's shirt. Neji desperately averted his eyes and speed-walked ahead of Tenten down the block as she jogged to catch up with him.

"Hey! Wait, Neji!" She called. Neji stopped without turning around.

"Walk faster, woman." He commanded. He heard her shoes screech on the sidewalk to a stop.

"Ex_cuse_ me?!"

"I _said--_"

"Oh, I heard what you said. No wonder no one ever mentioned you before! You're totally odious, as far as I can tell!"

Neji whirled around. "Then you can walk home!"

He stormed off as she screamed "fine!"

His heart was pounding as he slammed his car door shut and turned on the heat. It was _really_ cold. Insanely cold. His adrenaline was pumping as he pulled out of the parking space; he almost crashed into a pole. He accelerated down the street, but saw Tenten walking again.

Later, he would thank whatever told him to stop. At the time, it seemed stupid, and the kind of thing that some lovesick idiot like Sasuke would do. Horns of other cars beeped loudly but Neji ignored them. He slowed to a stop in the lane and rolled down the window.

"You've got one more chance." He called. Tenten looked up and rolled her eyes.

"You know, if it weren't so cold I'd hit you and flounce off. But, seeing as I am shaking from cold, I'll just accept it." She laughed wryly and climbed into the passenger seat. Neji frowned and stepped on the gas.

"Did it ever occur to you to just wear a winter coat? That's what _normal_ people do, you know." He sneered. But he couldn't avoid the teasing, flirtatious ring it had to it. Tenten smirked.

"Winter coats are for losers. I'm tough, you know? Rawr." She flexed her bicep. Neji rolled his eyes.

"Too tough for a cell phone as well, I gather."

"Yup. And too tough for heating, too tough for a car, too tough for pretty much all luxuries. I'm _roughin'_ it." She was laughing and it put Neji at ease. "But in all seriousness, turn up the fucking heat!" She yelled. Simultaneously she turned the heat on high and turned on the radio. A loud, heavy metal song began to play. "OOOHHH YEAH!" She yelled, wiggling around in her seat along with the 'music.' Neji choked and switched the station to a tame, classical piece. Tenten made a whining noise.

"Heavy metal is disgusting. There is no talent involved!" He said.

"Well it's still more fun that this crap. Actually, I'm stunned you even listen to music, Mr. Antisocial."

"The only person worse than me is Sasuke." Neji couldn't help but smile. Tenten saw his smile, and blushed. It was sexy. Probably because it was so rare. She laughed ruefully.

"I used to have the _biggest_ crush on Sasuke. But then again, all my friends did too. But I'm glad he's with Sakura now. They're perfect for each other." She sighed dreamily. Neji snorted.

"Crushes are pathetic. And I completely disagree. Sakura is a brainless twit."

"Are you _kidding_ me?! Sakura's going to med school in the fall! She's got like, an IQ of like two hundred!"

"_What!?_ She's always seemed so vapid to me."

"Nope! Plus she's so patient with Sasuke. He needs that. I could never give it to him, you know? I am a total hothead."

"No, really? I couldn't tell!" Neji faked an awestruck voice and widened his eyes. Tenten hit his arm.

"_Watch_ it, you. I'm a knife-thrower in the circus!" She warned, waggling a finger at him.

"So I saw."

"..You've been to the circus!? Funny, it seems like it'd go against some strict code you made up for yourself. Huh." She tapped her chin.

"It does. The circus is a waste of money, space, time, and workers. Hinata made me go with her to protect her from Naruto, Kiba, and Shino."

"Oh, wow. Let me guess, an impossible feat?"

"Correct. I suppose you aren't as stupid as you look."

"Oh, really clever. I'll let that one slide. You're so sour, I'll lower the social bar for you."

Neji shot her a glare when they pulled up to a red light, but when their eyes met, he couldn't help it—he smiled. A real smile. She was just too adorable. Yes, adorable. And for whatever reason, he was beginning to feel comfortable. They continued to look into each other's eyes, grinning and laughing a little bit.

Was this—was it, could it _possibly _be—Romance? The thing that was a genre at the bookstore with those disturbingly pink covers, the thing that had made Sasuke drop the ball completely, the--

well, you get the point. At any rate, it had clicked for Neji.

The light changed to green. Neji's hands were quivering from adrenaline and he had to grip the steering wheel to hide it. "You might want to tell me where you live sometime soon."

Tenten blushed. "You can just drop me off at the street, it's okay." She paused and looked away. "My house... well, I'd rather you didn't see it."

Neji snorted. "You're just trying to get me to take you home with me, aren't you?" It had come out before he could even begin to think about stopping it: The Flirtatious Invite Into His House.

He was officially in The Danger Zone now.

Luckily, Tenten laughed embarrassedly. "Maybe..." She said slowly, blushing and looking shifty-eyed. Neji smirked.

"I knew it. I _am_ irresistible, after all. If I were you, I'd have already jumped me by now."

Where was all this ridiculous flirting coming from?! Neji screamed inwardly. It was like word-vomit. He was acting stupid, like Naruto or something. Obviously, that was much worse than acting like Sasuke.

"...Wait. Seriously, can I stay at your house...?" She asked hesitantly. Neji twitched.

"Wh-what?!"

She looked down at the floor of the car. "Never mind. Um, my street... it's just up here. Yeah, here we are."

He pulled to a stop at the top of the street. Squinting in the darkness, he could see the street comprised mostly run-down row homes. Most of the windows were smashed in.

"You live _here?"_ He raised his eyebrows. Tenten nodded and reached to open the door. She mumbled something about good bye and thank you, and jogged down the street and into the darkness.

Neji sat in his car for awhile, staring at her street long after she had disappeared from sight. She probably hadn't been joking earlier, about not having heat.

And just like that, Neji knew what he had to do. He had to accept that he'd fallen in love. No one need know, not even Tenten. But he could cleverly make her life better, without her knowing who it was. It was so delightfully simple! He wouldn't look like a bumbling fool (see Sasuke). It was all too perfect!

At that, Neji turned his car around. He would not go home just yet tonight. He had some errands to run.

--

It was a box. A box, outside on her front doorstep.

What the hell was it doing here?

Tenten stood outside in the bitter cold morning, with her tattered bathrobe wrapped like Saran wrap around her small body, studying the package for a good ten minutes. What could it possibly be? There was no return address. It was small, about the size of a tissue box. Relatively lightweight.

Finally, curiosity killed the cat, and Tenten excitedly snatched up the package and ran inside squealing uncontrollably.

Without waiting she ripped open the package. Packing peanuts flew like shrapnel and the cardboard box was utterly destroyed. Now, Tenten stared stupidly at what lay before her.


	2. Punching Walls

A/N: Ugh. I'm still not happy with this chapter, but oh well. Oh yeah, and that thing I said about keeping this to three chapters?

Ha. Ha.

Not gonna happen.

Anyways, this chapter is a little lighter on the comedy and heavier on the drama, but hey, drama is awesome right? Right. Thank you all for all the lovely reviews! -cough-keep them coming-coughcough-

Chapter Two: Punching Walls

She had never seen so much cash at one time in her entire life. Dizzily she counted out the money. They added up to well over what she made in a month, even _before _taxes.

She could pay the bills now. Probably all of them, for at least two months. Tenten stared in a stupor at the money, counting and recounting. No more warning notices, no more late bills, no more freezing nights. Maybe, _maybe, _she'd have enough left over to treat herself to something...!

...But the question remained. Who had been kind enough to do this for her?

It was probably either Lee or Sakura. Ever since the pink haired girl had married the rich accountant Sasuke, she was filthy rich. ...Not that Tenten was jealous or anything. And even though Lee wasn't exactly made of money (despite what his green ensembles might connote) he _was_ the kind of person who would do that. He'd even tried to, in the past. But she had always refused.

And if she weren't so totally broke, she would have never accepted the money. But desperate times called for desperate measures, and clearly the person had _intended_ her to use the cash. They hadn't even left a return address, right? So she couldn't return the money anyway.

Squealing and dancing like a deranged bird, Tenten ran out of her house and to the bank. And yes, still in her pajamas.

--

"What? No, Tenten, I didn't send you all that money! You told me you wouldn't accept my money!" Lee yelled, shocked, into his apple-green cellphone.

Everyone had just arrived at work, looking zombie-like and clutching coffee mugs of various shapes, sizes, and colors. They stood around in the conference room for the morning meeting, with Sasuke writing figures on a white board. Really, even if he generally had the temperament of a constipated donkey, Neji had to give the guy credit for acting the same way no matter what time of day.

"Lee, get off the cell phone before I smash it." Sasuke snapped without turning around. Naruto giggled girlishly and leaned in to whisper in Neji's ear, "_someone_ slept on the couch last night."

Sasuke turned his head slightly. "I heard that, dobe."

Everyone chuckled half-heartedly, except for Lee who was apologizing profusely to Tenten and hanging up the phone less than discreetly.

Normally Neji would have been in an incredibly sour mood. He was absolutely _not_ a morning person, even with about a gallon of hot black coffee in his gut. Morning meant having to go to work, and it wasn't the work that bothered him. No, it was seeing all of these annoying and generally unattractive morons every single morning.

But today, he was feeling smug: only _he_ knew what Lee was talking about. Having such a good secret made him stand even taller and prouder than usual, and he couldn't stop the smirk from spreading widely across his face.

The _best_ part was that no one knew he had sent a good two grand to a girl he barely knew. In their eyes, he remained Heartless, Cruel, (and most importantly) Manly Neji. Perfect. People would continue to fear him and would not barge into his office, which was a particular pet peeve of his (Lee did not seem to be aware of this, or if he was, he must not have cared. Or maybe he had a death wish.).

Neji relished the image of her finding the package on her front step that morning, and opening it up to find the answer to her problems. He could picture her smiling happily, her whole pretty face lit up. The fact that he had done something for her and she owed her happiness to him, and no one else, made him feel lightheaded with something like happiness.

Thankfully Sasuke ended the meeting before he could think anymore disgustingly sappy thoughts. As everyone filed out of the room dumbly like swine, Sasuke snatched Neji and dragged him aside, and behind a water cooler.

"What the hell?!" Neji hissed, twisting free of Sasuke's grip. Sasuke had that look in his eyes that Neji knew all too well—the "yet again I figured out something before you, you mere mortal" look. This did _not_ bode well.

"I'm not stupid. I saw the look on your face when Lee was talking to that Bun head girl on his cellphone." He said in a low voice. He was good at masking his excitement, but Neji had known him long enough to recognize the signs: the foot tapping against the ground, the raised eyebrows. The lack of a frown, especially.

Neji wrinkled his nose. "I don't know what you're talking about--"

Sasuke waved his hand. "Forget it. Just, if you want my advice--"

"Which I do not."

"--Then send her something that girls actually like. Cash is...acceptable. But girls like other stuff."

"...like what?" Neji raised his eyebrows and frowned in curiosity. No need to keep up the feigned innocence now. Of course, Sasuke _would_ be the one to figure it out. Even Neji would (grudgingly) admit that the only person smarter than he or Shikamaru was Sasuke.

Sasuke shrugged and ticked off items on his fingers. "Perfume, clothes, jewelry, shoes... you get the picture."

Neji sighed resignedly, and leaned in closer, feeling a bit like he and Sasuke were discussing top secret attack plans for a battle. "How am I supposed to know what she likes?!" He hissed furiously. Sasuke gave Neji his "you must be mentally retarded" look.

"I don't know, figure it out! She's a girl, and I learned from Sakura that a good rule of thumb is the price tag."

"...What?"

"You just pick the most expensive thing of all the other things, and she's bound to like it. Trust me." Sasuke said as he nodded. Neji groaned, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"I swear to god, if you tell anyone--"

"I won't make any promises." Sasuke chuckled as he walked away, smirking. "Just remember what I said: the more digits, the better. Oh, and don't wait around to say anything to her."

Neji stood there alone for a moment, watched Sasuke disappear around the corner, and then kicked the wall as hard as he could.

"Well, Neji, looks like you've got a case of the Mondays!"

Neji froze. He recognized that voice. The only person more irritating and time consuming to run into than Lee was his older clone, Gai. Same green three piece suit, same health-nut attitude... same horrible hair and eyebrows. Oh, and it wasn't even Monday.

"Gai." He sighed, turning around slowly. Gai grinned a little too widely, giving Neji the thumbs-up.

"I'm glad you're feeling energetic, Neji, but that's no reason to damage property! HAHAHA!" He laughed a little too loudly and continued on his way, surprisingly enough. Neji sighed a sigh of great relief.

As Neji speed-walked back to his office, he considered Sasuke's words. Sure, Sasuke and Sakura had possibly the most freakish relationship ever, but Sasuke would _never_ have said anything if he weren't absolutely positive that he was right. The fact that Sasuke had wanted to help him made Neji feel a strange claustrophobia, and his throat closed up and his eyes burned. Hm, perhaps it was indigestion.

He locked the door to his office and plunked down in his wheelie chair. He brought up Google, and his fingers hesitated over the keyboard.

It had to be something girly, something expensive... anything else?

But he couldn't just randomly send her perfume. No, that'd be creepy. And for all of the time he'd spent gazing at her body, he still didn't know her size, so clothing was out of the question. He frowned, staring out the window, watching all the people walk by on the city sidewalks. Almost all of them wore sunglasses and were talking on cellphones. Neji sighed. He'd never understood why talking on the phone was fun--

That was it. A _cellphone!_

It was too perfect. It was something she needed. It was, depending on what kind, expensive. So it was practical, but it fell within Sasuke's Category of Acceptable Gifts for Women.

But how would he know what kind of phone girls liked? There were so many. His own phone was several years old and plain and black. It was serviceable though, and he had the cheapest plan possible. But that wasn't what a girl would want, right?

Finally, he decided that he'd just have to find a woman near Tenten's age and hope she would assist him in purchasing the best phone possible. Now all he had to do was wait three excruciatingly slow hours until his lunch break, when he could leave and quickly buy the phone.

--

It took every ounce of self-control in him to not just run down the street as he searched for a store. He gazed upward at the awnings and signs of stores, studying each one before moving on. There were definitely far too many stores in this city. Really, was there actually a need for a store _all about menopause?! _Neji shuddered, starting up his jog again as he continued to look at the awnings for some sign of cell phones--

"Ow! Watch where you're going, you bast—_Neji!?" _

Neji rubbed his chest where he'd gotten hit and looked up, ready to put the fear of god into whatever idiot had smacked into him--

Oh god.

It was Tenten.

They gaped at each other, open-mouthed, for a few minutes.

"D-do you work around here?" She finally broke the awkward silence. Neji snorted.

"Of course I do. I work with Lee and Sasuke and Naruto." He pointed behind him at the tall building a few blocks away. It was a relatively new building and gleamed impressively in the harsh winter sunlight. Tenten nodded, eyes widened. Her breath clouded in the air.

"...Oh. I was actually just headed over there. ...Want to walk with me? It's okay if you don't want to--" She blushed, waving her hands around embarrassedly. Neji almost choked.

"It's not that... I..." he panicked. He couldn't tell her where he was _really_ going. Then she'd think he was creepy for buying her a cell phone (and really, now that he thought about it, why _exactly_ did he have to buy her a phone? It really was creepy.). "Um, was just going out to lunch." He finished a bit lamely.

"Oh.. Fun. Um..." Sasuke's words echoed in his mind: _don't wait around to say anything to her..._

"I am not going with anyone else..." He said quickly, looking at Tenten pointedly. Tenten blushed even more.

"...If I didn't know any better I'd say you were inviting me to lunch." She grinned, folding her arms across her chest and looking up at him through thick, dark lashes. Neji smirked to hide the blush.

"Let's hope you don't know any better."

"Well, maybe I don't. So, where are you going?"

Neji noted that she was wearing a slightly new looking sweater. He couldn't help but smirk even more, feeling triumphant. It was probably thanks to him. It was dark blue and soft looking, although still somewhat shapeless, which annoyed Neji. One of these days he'd have to just get her clothes that fit her right. Obviously, she couldn't handle the task herself. But for now, he had to concentrate on the task at hand.

"You mean, where are _we_ going?"

Their eyes met and Tenten giggled. "Well, I like all food." She said, shrugging.

"And all I want is a decent cup of black coffee."

"Hmm. Sounds pretty easy. How about that cafe over there?" She pointed across the street to a cafe with the only trees on the entire city street in front of it, and a deep purple awning covering huge windows. Inside, there were the type of people that wore berets and read poetry and talked about their feelings.

In other words, Neji's own personal hell. But Tenten was gazing at it longingly, so Neji caved.

"...Good idea."

--

Neji would say one thing for the place: it was warm. But that was about where the benefits of it ended. It smelled heavily of incense and flavored coffee, and all around, at the many tables and chairs, people lounged about, smoking or enjoying their coffee and chatting. Almost all of them looked like _intellectuals._ The fakeness was just the sort of thing Neji despised, but Tenten was busy eying the baked goods behind the glass. She was bent over, pressing her hands and face against it.

"Ooh! Tiramisu! My favorite!" She gasped. "Oh, but look at that lemon cake! Oh my god, I'm so hungry. Everything looks good!"

If lemon cake was getting her this excited, it was evident the girl must not be eating much. Neji wrinkled his nose. Something about that bothered him. Uncomfortably, Neji stepped forward, hands shoved in his coat pockets, and studied the foods. He bent over a little bit too, as Tenten was. His gaze fell on a disturbing pink cake with idiotic little hearts drawn all over it in pink icing.

"What the _hell_ is that ridiculous--"

"Strawberry shortcake, duh! Ohh man, that looks amazing too!" She danced around excitedly. "I don't even know what I want!"

One of the people working behind the counter came over to them. He was about their age, with long blond hair and lots of eyeliner. His nails were painted—how unmanly—but at least it was black, and not some color like _purple._ Neji fought back a shudder. Tenten didn't even seem to notice the man's unusual get-up.

"Yeah, these cakes are just _art." _The blond sighed dreamily. Tenten nodded enthusiastically.

"Which one do you recommend??" She asked. Neji snorted.

"Cake for lunch? That's _hardly_ nourishment--"

"Your point?!" Tenten glared threateningly at Neji. He rolled his eyes.

"You should be eating real food-" He cut himself off this time. Since _when_ did _he_ parrot Rock Lee's health speeches? He almost felt like going and washing his mouth out with soap. How mortifying. He shrugged at Tenten. "...But obviously you want cake." He finished. Tenten stared at him oddly for a minute, and slowly turned back to the blond guy. Her cheeks were pink, but her ears were too.

"Well, we have soups and salads... but those just aren't that exciting, you know? Baking is _art._ These cakes... they're beautiful. It nourishes the _soul_-" He shot a glare at Neji, "-and that's just as good, right? I do recommend the chocolate layer cake, though."

"Ooh!" Tenten squealed as he pulled a cake out from behind the glass and showed it to her. Admittedly, it was nicely decorated. There were tiny flowers made of chocolate decorating the sides as well as perfectly molded leaves. "I'm definitely going to have a slice of this." She turned to him. "What about you, Neji?" She smiled, still pink.

"Lemon cake. Because you look so miserable you look like you sucked a lemon. Hahah!" The blond cut in, slapping the counter as he laughed, and Neji glared, wishing he had as effective a death glare as Sasuke. Tenten rolled her eyes.

"Aw, come on, that's not even that funny!" She said, laughing. Neji couldn't help but smile a little bit, and he caught Tenten's pretty brown eyes. She gazed into his eyes, still smiling and blushing. "Um, right, how about two pieces of the chocolate layer cake then?" She said, giggling and very flustered. She pulled out a very ratty-looking wallet, but Neji nearly tackled her and knocked her out of the way.

"That'll be six bucks." The blond said as he cut up two pieces of the cake. Tenten glared and stomped on Neji's instep.

"OW! What the hell is your problem--"

"_I'm_ paying! That whole thing about the guy always paying is so archaic! Besides..." Her eyes glittered. "...I just came into a whole bunch of cash. I wanna celebrate!" She slapped down the six dollars before Neji could do anything and the blond took it, grinning.

"Enjoy!"

Still grumbling and trying to ignore the pain in his foot, Neji held the two plates of cake as they made their way to the back, where in a corner there was a table for two. It was directly under a pretty yellow lamp and had a sprig of some kind of flowers on the table. Neji masked a cat-like smile as they sat down. The table was so small that their knees bumped and they both reddened.

"So... um... I still don't know exactly what you do, haha." Tenten said through a mouthful of cake. Neji picked at the cake, pushing the bits around on the plate with his fork. He'd never been one for cake.

"Accountant. I like numbers."

Tenten nodded. "You and Sasuke and Shikamaru all like math a lot, huh? Although Lee was never good with it. He's more of a people person, you know?"

Neji set his fork down and rested his chin on his hands. It was probably a bad idea to comment on the fact that Lee was utterly useless as a human being, seeing as Tenten was so close to him. "How do you know him?"

Tenten giggled and stuffed a forkful of cake into her mouth. "It's a funny story actually. I met him in high school, because I was getting bullied and joined the Karate club, which he was the president of." She tapped her fork against her lips thoughtfully. "He was so nice to me, always. For a while we even dated, but I don't know. He didn't make me feel like you're _supposed _to feel when you're attracted to someone, you know? Luckily he's so kind that he didn't take it too bad and we're still friends. Plus, I think he's always liked Sakura anyway."

"She went to the same high school?" Neji asked, turning over in his mind the piece about her getting bullied. He was getting that weird burning sensation in his eyes again, and the strange claustrophobia that he'd felt that morning after talking to Sasuke. He'd pegged it earlier as indigestion, but maybe he actually was coming down with something.

"Yup. Haha, she had even fewer friends than _I_ did. Everyone made fun of her because of her forehead, which I personally never thought was that big anyway--"

"Yes it is."

Tenten rolled her eyes. "Well, whatever. _Still. _It was no reason for her to be totally ostracized all of high school. I think that's why she didn't go to med school in the first place. Like, she didn't have the confidence."

Neji leaned forward, having completely abandoned his cake. Plus, she smelled good, and the closer he got, the better he could smell her. "Did you go to college?"

She snorted. "Absolutely not. No money, plus, I like... flunked all of my classes in high school. I hated it there, you know? Everyone was always so mean..." She looked down, her brown eyes filling with sadness. But when she looked up again, she'd expertly hidden the sadness. "What about you?" She asked a little too brightly.

"Konoha Institute of Technology. Majored in math, minored in physics."

Tenten laughed. "You _would _minor in something like physics Sasuke went there, right?"

"Yes, and we had the same major and minor. I got to know him very well. We were even roommates for the last two years of college, and in the last year, Shikamaru joined us."

"Wow, awesome."

They continued to talk for another hour. Tenten finished her cake, and Neji's too, but Neji didn't even notice. He was so totally transfixed. Even the way she talked was pretty. So lively and happy. If he'd had the kind of life she'd had, he certainly wouldn't be so kind.

Finally, they both realized that it was well beyond two o'clock. Scrambling out of the cafe, they both headed frantically back towards the office. Tenten had wanted to see Lee, so it made sense to go together.

They ran across the street and as a car came towards them, Neji instinctively grabbed Tenten's small hand and pulled her faster across the street. When he'd realized what he'd done, he blushed and dropped her hand like he'd touched fire.

"Um..."

"Pretend that didn't happen." Neji said quickly as they entered the office building. Tenten laughed.

"Okay, fine, I will—just this once though!" She warned as they entered the elevator. Neji smirked, looking down at her. The close proximity, the privacy of the elevator—it was getting to him. Uncomfortably, he shifted around, finally settling for folding his arms across his chest. Tenten poked his arm, nearly causing him to jump out of his own skin. He could feel his body temperature rising, and even worse—other things rising.

This sucked.

But from this vantage point, he had a perfect view straight down her sweater—which wasn't low cut, but so big on her that it may as well have been—and her bra and the smooth skin-

Thankfully, the elevator pinged and the door opened. They had arrived at their floor. Neji didn't think he could have handled another second in that tiny elevator with her. He tugged on his tie, loosening it and breathing a sigh of relief.

"What did you need to talk to Lee about?" He asked, trying to get his mind out of the gutter.

Tenten grinned. "I mentioned before that I came into a lot of cash recently... I think it might be his doing. It was either him or Sakura, I know that."

Neji hid a smile. "Well, his office is that way." He pointed in the direction of Lee's office. Tenten grinned and turned to Neji, looking up at him sweetly.

"You know, at first I really disliked you. But I'm warming up to you, you know. I'd better see you around, okay?" She winked, waved, and bounced off to Lee's office. Neji gaped, open-mouthed.

What had just happened?

Like a zombie he made his own way back to his office in a stupor. He had just been flirted with. Seriously. He fell into his wheelie chair (although it slipped a bit so he almost fell onto the floor) and continued to gape.

Was it actually possible for a woman to like him? ..._Was he date-able!?_

Certainly, women had been attracted to him before. In high school, there had been an entire fan club devoted to him and his dashing good looks and general perfection. But of course none of those girls had ever approached him, looking for a realistic relationship. They were always threatening to kill themselves if he didn't kiss them, or some other absolutely ludicrous threat along those lines.

...And of course, he wasn't going to _date_ Tenten. That would be completely moronic. Dating was for imbeciles who didn't mind sacrificing their dignity for a woman. No, he had no interest in that.

But it was nice to know, of course, that it _was_ an option, that he, Neji Hyuuga, was still irresistibly sexy. He still had "it."

...Whatever "it" was.

Just then he heard a knock on the door. Neji narrowed opalescent eyes at the door. Whoever dared interrupt his reverie would pay.

"Come in if you must." He sighed loudly. The door opened to reveal Tenten.

"_If you must?_ Oh, that's real polite, Neji. Gee, no wonder you're so popular!" She said sarcastically, rolling her eyes. Neji glowered, but it had no effect on Tenten.

She made her way across the room and jumped up on Neji's desk and swung her legs around, so that she was facing him and Neji was presented with an awkward (but not wholly unwelcome) view. He leaned back in his wheelie chair, feeling significantly cornered. Tenten seemed oblivious to his discomfort. "Wow, what a nice office! Lee wasn't kidding when he said yours was the best! You've got a view of the city and everything!" She gasped. She twisted around to look at his computer. "But you've got like, no pictures or anything...D-don't you have a girlfriend?" She was clearly trying to appear offhand and casual, but it had failed miserably. Neji shook his head.

Tenten fake-laughed, obviously very tense and nervous. "That's funny... because... um... I don't have a boyfriend! Haha! Funny..." She bent her head, but glanced up to meet Neji's eyes. Neji's breathing hitched. Now _there_ was a look that he found utterly irresistible. Those dark, warm eyes, fringed through thick black eyelashes... looking at him so sweetly...

He'd never been one to act without thinking (how foolish) but before he could muster the neurons to stop himself, he realized he had moved forward in his wheelie chair and had grabbed her legs, pulling her off the desk and onto his lap, earning a squeak of confusion from Tenten.

...Now what?

But he didn't have to think too long about that, because all of a sudden he had wrapped one arm around her waist and placed one hand on the back of her head as he pulled her closer to him and pressed his mouth against hers. Even though her knee was digging into his thigh uncomfortably, and they were in danger of tipping over the chair (or worse, breaking it), Neji found he didn't really care that much. Tenten's hands had found their way to the buttons on Neji's shirt and were currently undoing them, her soft fingers occasionally brushing his skin.

"So... about me... not having a boyfriend..." She breathed as Neji's fingers tugged apart her hair ties, letting her soft brown hair cascade down her back. Neji heard it but didn't process it—he was far too busy with her jaw. "N-Neji?"

"What."

"I want you to be my boyfriend." She finally said, pushing away from him a bit and raising her eyebrows. Neji choked.

"I don't date." He said automatically, still feeling dizzy from the previous "activity." He tried to lean in again to continue, but Tenten backed away, gaping at him..

"...What did you say?"

"I said, I don't date. Now can we get back to-" He began, impatiently, but Tenten slapped his hands away and tumbled backwards out of the chair.

"Don't take advantage of me!" She yelled, standing up rather shakily.

"What are you talking about? You didn't seem to have any problem with it a minute ago!" Neji yelled back, his face flushing with anger and frustration. He stood up and walked over to her, towering over her.

"Because I didn't think you were the type of guy who'd just expect he could kiss a girl without any strings attached!" She shrieked, backing away. Part of Neji was stung by this, but the other part was infuriated.

"You're a complete psycho, you know that? I really don't see why you're freaking out so much, but whatever the case, I would _never_ date a psychotic woman like you!" He yelled. Tenten gasped.

"I was right about you from the beginning, and I don't know why I ever let myself think you were anything but a misogynistic prick!" She turned on her heels and left his office, slamming the door as hard as she could.

The silence that followed seemed odd. Probably the entire office had heard everything. She'd made him look like a fool.

Well, at least he'd gotten that over with. Now, he'd proven to himself once and for all that women were just annoying accessories designed to make men look stupid. Feeling pleased, he sat back down in his chair. He could get a lot of work done today, now that he'd gotten rid of that annoying pest named Tenten.

...But if that was true, then why did he feel like punching a hole in the wall?

--


	3. As Friends

Soo, I know this is late, and it's rather short, but hell. It's something. And I think it turned out alright. PLEASE REVIEW!! NOW!! DO IT NOW!

Well. I guess you should read the chapter first. But, you know. Reviews should be like candy. Sweet, fattening, and plentiful.

Enjoy, dearies.

Love is Not Manly

Chapter Three: As Friends

Neji paused, for no clear reason, at the salad bar. The moldy, soggy leaves were doing nothing more harmful than sitting in their container, but still Neji stared.

"Man, 'All You Can Eat' buffets are awesome!" Naruto cried in a glee similar to that of winning the lottery. Neji rolled his eyes and considered the pros and cons of homicide as he continued to decorate the pile of green slop with shredded orange ornaments known as cheap cheese.

He had been coerced into going out to lunch by his idiotic coworkers, although admittedly it hadn't been that difficult for them. Neji had been too tired to put up much of a fight, and horrifically enough, a lonely and significantly unmanly part of him kind of wanted to go. He'd been working his ass off for the past three weeks, to the point where he twitched often and began laughing hysterically at nothing, and overreacting to the littlest things.

Everyone commented on it, even the somewhat manly men in the office who were, despite their slight worry, glad to see Neji so productive. He hadn't been this productive in weeks, and the rate at which he churned out completed projects was something of which to be in awe.

Then again, it was irritating when he screamed at Lee for breathing too loudly, or when his mug fell off the table, Neji laughed as though it were the funniest thing he had ever seen. And Neji _did not laugh._

Yes, Neji was losing it. But he was, in fact, aware of it, and too pleased with his inordinate pay raise to halt this disturbing pattern.

"Got enough cucumber slices there?" Shikamaru queried in a half-amused, half-scared tone.

Neji glanced down to see his plate heaped to high heaven with the stuff. He must have not been paying attention and gotten lost in his thoughts. Disgusted, he dropped the plate in the trash, and stalked off to get his eighth cup of coffee for the day. In the process, he burned his hand and spilled coffee on some old woman, but he was too out of it to do much more than giggle inanely and wander off.

"Damn, you're a robot disguised as a man, Neji! No food? I bet that's actually oil that you're drinking." Naruto laughed, prompting everyone to laugh. Neji sorely wished at that moment that he had just stayed in his office.

"And you're an idiot, disguised as a moron!" Neji snapped, rubbing his forehead, which was, at the moment, throbbing uncontrollably.

Hinata touched his arm.

"Neji, I think you need some sleep." She said, as though he were a hopeless drug addict (how unmanly) and she was the only one left in his life who was willing to try and help him free himself of the drugs.

Well, caffeine was a drug, actually. At this thought, Neji gave an absurd little laugh, earning shocked stares from his coworkers.

"Are you on crack?" Sasuke demanded, and by the tone of his voice and the look on his face, Neji knew he was not, in fact, joking. Not that Sasuke had ever joked in his life anyway.

"I don't have TIME to do drugs!" Neji said loudly, snickering at the thought of sitting in his office, putting off work by smoking up. Naruto stood up abruptly.

"Neji, help me get something from the car..." Naruto sounded oddly nervous, so Neji followed him outside, convinced the fool was going to ask him to help him get with Hinata.

Once outside, and in the parking lot of the small restaurant, Naruto turned to face Neji. He frowned. Neji raised his eyebrows, although one of them was involuntarily twitching.

And then came the blow. Naruto's fist collided with Neji's nose, there was a cracking sound, and someone screamed.

"What the fuck!?" Neji yelled, turning away and clutching his nose. Naruto's blue eyes narrowed.

"Cause you needed it. What the hell is up, you asshole? We're all worried for you, Hinata is practically having kittens because she's--"

"Oh, I KNEW this was about Hinata." Neji snarled, still holding his nose and seeing stars. It wasn't the wound itself so much as the shame. He had been punched by Naruto, of all people. He could quite keenly feel his Manly Meter dropping sharply.

Naruto rubbed his face in frustration.

"You are such an asshole, I have no idea why I care. Look, everyone is worried sick about you. You're completely losing it! You randomly laugh and then flip out, like you're a woman with your period! What the hell is going on?!"

Neji froze.

"W-woman? _WOMAN?!_" He screamed. Naruto glared.

"Actually, worse than that. Now, answer the question!"

...What was wrong with him? Well, he knew precisely what, and it had brown hair twisted into buns and perfect emotive brown eyes and a temper, but he was not about to admit that. He, ever-manly Neji, did _not_ feel anything for women.

"I can think of nothing being wrong." He said coldly. Now Naruto looked sad. He shook his head.

"I guess I just have to do what Hinata said, and be patient with you." He sighed, and left Neji outside as he returned to the restaurant.

--

Neji pered out of the window, throiugh the blinds, into the main area, where all the cubicles were. People pretended to be making phone calls, scribbling down things on notepads, but mostly they were daydreaming and slacking off completely. After lunch, it was always difficult to concentrate quite as hard. People overate and lulled themselves into a gentle drowsiness as they stared out the windows like cattle waiting for their next opportunity to graze.

Of course, this was not what intrigued Neji. He had observed this pattern for years, and even despite his current state, he found it no more interesting. No, the intriguing part was something Neji hated to admit was even remotely intriguing, but unfortunately it was.

Because there was Tenten, standing in a pale pink sweater and (thank goodness) wearing a dark red jacket, topped off with a stripey scarf. It was something she had most likely purchased with the gift he had given her, and at this thought, a smile spread across Neji's handsome face.

But then he stopped himself. "I'm acting absurd." He muttered to himself, running his hands through his hair/ He stalked back to his desk and stared at his screen. But his mind wandered too much—the numbers blended together and he couldn't seem to pull them apart.

"Oh, you're friendly with Neji, right? That's his office right there. I think he could use a visit from someone he actually likes." Sakura's chirpy, irritating voice pierced through his doorway (and he'd even soundproofed the thing). He flinched and pictured decapitating her, which seemed to calm him down effectively enough.

"That's... um... howabout we get coffee!" Tenten suggested brightly, the anxiety evident in her voice.

Ow. That stung. Neji shuddered, and turned back to his computer, glaring furiously at it. "Must... concentrate... Must...get... work... done... must--"

"Wow, you even talk to yourself. Sakura wasn't kidding that you were going insane. So have you been prescribed meds yet or what?"

Tenten was standing there, her hands on her hips. Neji choked, but quickly regained his composure.

"Maybe you could lend me yours. Although they don't seem to work." Neji sneered without looking away from his computer.

"Why, that's so clever! Ah, that wit of yours, Neji... sharp as a marshmallow!"

"Well, that's why you're here, isn't it? To experience such a caliber of good looks, wit, and charm that you cannot experience anywhere else." Oh sweet Jesus, he was flirting again. Where had this... this Monster of Flirting come from?! Insidious!

"Actually..." Tenten looked down, "I came to apologize. And to see if we could be friends again." She blushed, and Neji had to grab a pencil and snap it under the desk to relieve his hands of their twitching, for he longed to touch her. Tenten smiled. "I hear you're going insane. You know, you need to calm down. Maybe we should hang out some time. I think... I think we had a good thing going, that is, until we acted like idiots. So, what do you say? Friends?" She stepped forward, and held out her soft petite hand. Neji stood, slowly, and they shook hands hesitantly, not making eye contact.

"I suppose we could arrange something of the sort." Neji said, smirking. Tenten's eyes sparkled with humor.

She released his hand and swung up on his desk, although not in the same way that she had before. A little guarded, the motion being one of forced friendliness.

"So, Naruto punched you!" She settled back and Neji sat back down slowly in his chair, relaxing back.

"The idiot couldn't stop himself from looking cool." He said shortly, tidying the different things on his desk. The small container of cheap ballpoint pens, the one nice black expensive pen next to his computer, the two paperweights, the stack of clean paper, the stack of files. Tenten watched with amusement.

"You really don't like messes, do you?" She asked, touching the pen container and knocking it down. Neji absently fixed it.

"There is no reason for anything to be messy." He condescended, eying Tenten's messy hair. That mess, however, he liked.

Tenten smirked and laid down completely.

"It's a wonder you don't have an ulcer yet." She sighed. Neji rolled his eyes.

"It's a wonder you haven't completely turned into the Female Lee yet." He jabbed. "I wouldn't be surprised if you drink those ridiculous health shakes and do yoga."

Tenten laughed. "Yoga and health food are expensive. Although..." She sat up excitedly, sitting back on her heels so that she closely resembled a child. There was no way to halt the stupid little smile on Neji's face. Goddammit. "...I just got a _job._ A real one. Not in the circus."

Neji raised his eyebrows. Congratulating was for women and gay men.

"What?"

"I'm working two of them, actually. One as a secretary... here!" She shrieked. Neji gaped. "Since Sakura is resigning. It's wonderful."

"What's the other one?"

"Washing dishes..." She sighed. "It's not glamorous but it gets me the money to buy the clothes I need for this job." She picked at one of her nails. "Remember how I got that sum of money a while ago?"

Oh, how he remembered. Neji nodded. "Well, that reminded me how nice it is to have money. It's just... so wonderful, to have heating, and food."

"And a coat." He added. Tenten glowed.

"Isn't it adorable? I really think red is a good color on me—"

"Pink is better." the comment flew out of Neji's mouth before he could even stop it, and he looked even more surprised than Tenten did.

"Wh-what?"

"Don't stutter, it's bad enough to have Hinata do it. It's so unbecoming." He snapped. Tenten's gape turned into a smile.

"You know, I've said this before, but... you really are a good guy. I mean really. You probably don't know it, but you're actually a big old sweetie." She sighed affectionately. Neji choked.

"Sweetie?! Absolutely not. I am never a _sweetie..._" He sniffed with pure contempt. Tenten laughed.

"Yes, you are! You're adorable. You just don't know it, which makes it even better."

"I'd hit you, but I don't have time to be arrested. And undoubtedly, you'd hit me back." He sighed irritably.

"It's true. I'd beat you, then put you in jail to get beat up by those creeps."

Neji wrinkled his nose.

A comfortable, happy silence passed between them, as they stared at each other.

"You... do you want to, um... go out to the movies or something, tonight?" Tenten asked, looking away and turning bright red.

"As friends, of course." Neji said, smirking and resting his elbows on the table. Tenten nodded.

"As friends."

--

"But how can you _say_ that? It's so misogynistic!" Tenten sighed as Neji paid for their tickets.

"It's true. You women spend your entire day preening and prepping for us. It may not be easy to accept, but you exist to look good."

"But what about unattractive women? Or lesbians?" Tenten protested as they chose drinks. Neji snorted.

"An unattractive woman is like a foul-tasting candy bar, or a decaf coffee. It has failed its purpose. And as for lesbians, obviously they have to be double agents. They must look good without the nail polish and the high heels, and must only admire the undecoratedly attractive women."

"Undecoratedly? Is that even a _word?_" Tenten teased. Neji unwittingly held the door open for her.

"If I decree thus, yes. And I do decree." Neji retorted. They chose a seat at the back, and to the left. "Oh, good. This way we don't have to be near everyone else."

"Why am I not surprised?" Tenten plopped down, the entire bag of popcorn on her lap. Neji shed his black jacket and folded it and draped it over the back of the chair before sitting down. "This will be a good movie." She said in the middle of stuffing her face with popcorn. Neji rolled his eyes.

"You haven't seen it yet. How do you know? And don't tell me you can see into the future."

"No, but I read the reviews. It's about this woman and her dog--"

"Oh god. Hold on, let me go and get a gun, just in case." Neji sighed dramatically, letting his head fall back. Tenten laughed.

"You don't like animals?"

"I don't like movies with animals in them. They're always insipid and sappy to no end."

"Do you like movies at all?"

"No."

"Then you're here out of the goodness of your own heart." Tenten looked over at him, grinning as the movie came on. Neji smirked and looked over at her, their eyes meeting.

"Don't fool yourself."

As the movie progressed, the dog died (as Neji had predicted from the very beginning.). Tenten was sniffling and clutching his arm at the parts she found particularly sad, and Neji stared at the screen, not really seeing anything, only feeling her hand on his arm. Was it just him, or was it hot in the theatre? He tugged on the collar of his shirt. He'd changed for the date—no, not a date. The... appointment? Well, whatever. He had worn jeans (gasp!) and a dark blue button-up shirt, tucked in, with a white tee shirt underneath and the sleeves rolled up. He had tried very hard to look casual, and _not_ date-like. Tenten had donned a pink blouse that had Chinese-style closures and black jeans, with heels and the red coat she'd worn earlier. Her hair was done up in buns, as usual, and Neji had to stop himself from kissing her or hugging her or some other embarrassing motion.

After the movie, they went to get ice cream and walk around.

"I can't believe you don't like ice cream." Tenten exclaimed, picking at her cone of chocolate and peanut butter. Neji stared at it witheringly.

"It makes my teeth ache." He sneered. "Besides, it's so cold outside—how can you stand ice cream?!"

"Nothing comes in between me and my sweets." Tenten said proudly.

Neji drove her home, with them flirting and laughing the whole way. He hadn't felt this relaxed in... well, he_ never_ had felt this relaxed.

"When are you going to move out and get a nice house?" He pestered her as they pulled up in front of the house. Tenten shrugged.

"When I save up enough, I guess."

Tenten stepped out of the car, and Neji stepped out too.

"I've never seen it inside. You're letting me in." He commanded, and Tenten laughed, unlocking the door.

"It's pretty crappy. Don't make fun of me." She pouted. Neji shoved his hands into his coat pockets so that he wouldn't reach out and grab her.

Inside, it was shabby, but nice. It smelled like perfume, the subtle one that she always wore. He'd only been able to detect it when he was very close to her, which somehow made him go insane.

"It's one floor?" He raised his eyebrows, noting the couch doubled as a bed. It was made, but was still messy. The television was across from it, with a coffee table also doubling as a nightstand. It was smart of her, to conserve space and furniture. It made the house feel more spacious.

"Yeah...my dream is to live in a house with _three_ floors." She said this as though it were heaven.

"My house has three floors. It's a pain." He said as he studied the kitchen. Also neat, but not too so. She was not a naturally messy person, but she wasn't naturally neat, either.

"I can't even imagine. And you're just one person!"

"I used to rent it with other people. Shikamaru, Chouji, Sasuke, and Shikamaru's various girlfriends. It seemed too small at the time." He said irritably. They'd forced Shikamaru and Chouji up to the third floor because of their messy and usually smelly way of life. Sasuke and Neji each adhered to a strict routine, and coming downstairs to find the first floor covered in trash and drunken women broke that routine generally.

"Wow. That must have been... _interesting._" She said, smirking. Neji sighed, rolling his eyes.

"You have no idea. One time, the tub was filled up with beer, and there was this woman lying in it, asleep. I thought she might have drowned. Oh, and another time, we woke up to find the windows shattered. Eventually, Sasuke moved out to live with Naruto--"

"Which says something." Tenten interjected, laughing. Neji nodded.

"I know. And then I finally forced Chouji and Shikamaru out. It was too much for one sane person." He sighed, leaning against the counter. Tenten laughed and boosted herself up onto the counter.

"I always wish I had had a crazy college life." She sighed wistfully. Neji snorted.

"It wasn't crazy so much as stupid and irritating." Neji complained. He folded his arms and sighed, but stopped when he realized what had happened. Tenten's legs dangled off the counter, and his elbow was resting on her leg. She hadn't seemed to notice, so Neji decided with a sly glance to leave it there.

"Yeah... I never went to college of course. I started working right away. Now _that_ was stupid and irritating." She said sadly. Neji turned his head to look at her. Thanks to the counter, their eyes were perfectly level. Neji forced himself to not think about the fact that their mouths were, too.

Tenten turned her head to look at him, and she smiled. "I like having a friend like you, Neji. You're... smart." She said thoughtfully. "I don't know a lot of smart people."

"Yes well with friends like Lee and Sakura, I too would lose faith in the intelligence of humanity." Neji teased, still holding her gaze.

"Oh, you. ...You have such odd eyes." She said, staring into them and frowning as she examined them. "I've never seen anything quite like them. One would think you were blind."

He really really wished he was blind right now, because he had a healthy view of Tenten's cleavage. He coughed a bit awkwardly.

"Well, I'm not, obviously." He smirked. Tenten smiled softly, and something in the air changed. He wasn't sure what it was, but it was different than anything he'd ever experienced before. The tension was so thick that it was difficult to breathe, and Tenten seemed to be having the same issue. Before he could even consider halting himself, he reached up and cupped her chin. They both closed their eyes, and moved closer together. He could practically taste her already, and he was so close...

But then his rational side began screaming at him, waving banners, and dancing around like monkeys. Neji dropped his hand and moved away.

"This is stupid." He said quickly, moving away from the counter. Tenten flushed.

"You're right."

"I mean, we already tried that."

"And it failed."

"Crashed and burned."

"Terrible, terrible idea."

"Won't happen again."

"Certainly not."

"I should leave."

"Yes. We'll talk later."

"Of course. Because we're just friends."

"Obviously."

"Definitely."

Neji slammed the door and was thankful for the wonderfully freezing night air washing him over and cooling his rising body temperature somewhat.

Inside, Tenten jumped off the counter and drank a bottle of cold water. She gasped for breath. Simultaneously, they each said,

"Dammit!"

--


	4. High Voltage

Love is Not Manly

Author's note: WELL. This only took me forever to come up with; it's only five pages too. I am so sorry, but hey—I've already started the next chapter, and I wanted to leave this off at a good place.

I hope you guys like it! We're like halfway through! Yay! And _so close_ to the lemony fresh chapter that I intend to write. Heheh... enjoy, my dearies, and PLEASE REVIEW! It makes me happy, kay?

Chapter Four: High Voltage

Since Lee was such a generous, nice guy, he had deemed it quite necessary to throw a party, simultaneously celebrating Sakura's entrance to medical school as well as Tenten's start at the office in the new med student's stead. This was all fine and dandy...except that Neji had been so kindly invited by Lee to supply the hors d oeuvres. Already people were anticipating the party, whispering about how 'something big' was going to happen. Neji didn't understand the excitement but understood it to be a sign that their lives were really that mundane.

"Don't worry about it. I'll go with you to the super market." Tenten said, sipping a cappucino and lounging on Neji's desk, as she had taken to doing in the three days that she had been working here. Neji scowled at the abominable email from Lee, and deleted it with a fierce click of the mouse. Tenten eyed him. "You _do_ know what hors d'oeuvres are...right?" She quirked a penciled eyebrow. Neji wrinkled his nose and leaned back in his chair, meeting her eyes. A spark flew, but Neji had gotten good at ignoring when that happened with Tenten, as it seemed it happened every few seconds.

"That's what google was made for. Anyway, I don't even want to go." Neji said irritably. He was more than positive that Lee had only assigned him the task of carting the food to the party so that he would have to go. "I'm thrilled that Sakura is leaving, but I don't see why I have to spend my money to show it."

"You know, you really _are_ Scrooge, you know that? Come on. It's almost Christmas." Tenten coaxed, shifting on the desk to look him in the eyes, although what that mainly accomplished, unbeknownst to Tenten, was an eyeful of what was down that pale pink blouse. Or maybe she knew exactly what she was doing. The thought that she might caused a warm sensation to flood Neji's body. Nevertheless, he averted his eyes with great velocity.

"I don't care." He said petulantly. Continuing to scroll through his new emails, he landed on a most displeasing email. He swore."I have to go for a drink with the guys tonight. Excellent. I just love spending my entire weekend with people I have to endure all week as well." Neji sighed, reading the email from Naruto. It was in difficult-to-read orange font and was missing the novel and fine concept of punctuation, so Neji hardly had to read the name of the sender to identify it. How bothersome.

"Stop whining! That is an order, Mr. Hyuuga." Tenten said, winking as she slid off his desk. "Now, lunch is over, so I'll be going back to sitting at the desk and reading trashy magazines and debating on what I should wear tomorrow night. See ya!" She sashayed out of Neji's office, and Neji, for it seemed the billionth time, considered the many wonderful things high heels and a tight skirt did for a woman.

Then again, all he ever thought about was Tenten-related things. What jokes he could tell to her, what movies she'd want to see, how he could make her feel more welcome here. It was absurd, because he, Hyuuga Neji, _didn't_, by his very definition of his existence, do things like that.

On second thought...maybe a few drinks tonight would do him good.

--

"So...You're pretty cozy with the new secretary!" Chouji hiccoughed, taking another generous swig of his beer and elbowing Neji in the ribs. Neji bristled and rolled his eyes as Naruto and Shikamaru joined in on teasing him. Thankfully, Lee, Sasuke, and Kiba weren't here, or he might have shot himself at this point.

"Tenten's _hot._" Naruto slurred, giggling inanely and slinging an arm around Neji's shoulders. "You guys gonna get it on any day now?"

Neji couldn't take any more of this. He glanced down at his thus untouched beer.

"Yeah, I know _I_ would have moved in on that the minute I saw it!" Chouji said, and Shikamaru nodded enthusiastically, his eyes crossing in his drunkenness.

The problem was, he knew they were merely egging him on. Any fool could see the high-voltage tension between him and Tenten that had been developing. Her job in the same office had seemed to cause a sonic boom of new tension already, and of course, just as fast, people were talking. Tenten had reddened, telling him to ignore it, but it was difficult when everyone seemed to be voicing his thoughts.

Worst of all...he wouldn;t exactly mind dating her now. Scratch that, the thought of her with any other guy seemed wrong and obscene. But they had that agreement, and breaching it at this point seemed unmanly. He would _not_ go back on his word.

"Dude...you guys like each other so much...why aren't you dating?" Shikamaru asked, his voice holding the air of philosophical pondering that only someone quite so drunk could manage with a straight face.

As the night wore on, it was a question that was firmly placed in the forefront of his mind, refusing to leave. Yes, the answer was that they'd decided to not date. But Neji felt...silly, for holding out like this. He didn't want to go back on his word, but that was an issue of pride. What he really wanted was to date Tenten...He wanted Tenten. And no, not in the stupid, sexual tension and short tight skirts sort of way, although he wanted her that way too. No, he _liked_ her. He wanted to sit around watching television with her. He wanted to make her laugh. He wanted to go and see stupid movies, and pay for her addiction to sweets. So...what was he going to do?

For now, the only viable option seemed to be to drink himself into oblivion, and Neji did just that.

--

"The party starts at eight thirty, so we should get there early to help him set these up." Tenten said, snatching several boxes of fancy crackers off of the shelf and dropping them into the shopping cart. Neji sighed. He was slightly hung over and stressed out about his latest epiphany, and these two things made it even more difficult to accept the fact that he would, indeed, have to see his coworkers _outside_ of work.

"Does this mean I can leave early?" Neji asked with false hope in his voice as he pushed the cart, with Tenten trotting along the shelves and grabbing various needed items. She shot him a glare that was just as false.

"_No,_ Scrooge. You're staying until the very end! It won't be so bad, though...I'll be there, remember?" She grinned and Neji flicked her nose absently. Really, she was the only thing stopping him from sending Lee a lovely little email telling him to, in so many words, fuck himself up the ass with his fucking hors d'oeuvres.

Neji almost cried when the cashier announced the total, but Tenten reminded him that he had to do it either way.

"I suppose. I just resent spending my money on someone that wears green three piece suits." Neji sighed as they walked back to his car, plastic bags in tow. Tenten laughed.

"So...who do you think will hook up at the party?" She asked, a strange glint evident in her chocolate eyes. Neji rolled his eyes, but inwardly, wondered if this question was loaded. Nervousness began to plague him.

"Not this bullshit. ...Although if you really want my opinion, Chouji's been eying that loudmouth from advertising for months now."

"Ino-chan? Hm. Maybe... Are you going to go for anyone?" She winked, although it was a forced action. At once, it felt like he had been slapped across the face.

So this was how it really was. The question hadn't been loaded after all; she expected him to be with someone else. Had he been imagining the tension between them these past weeks? He must have. He had been a fool. His thoughts from the night before now seemed absurd and girlish; he had been wrong all along, and it stung.

They both stood still, looking at each other, their breaths clouding in the cold night air, the wind rustling the plastic bags slightly. Neither had meant for it to be awkward, and neither had meant to pause. Each felt the blood rushing to their face. Neji swallowed, and they broke the eye contact. To his horror, he felt like he might actually cry. His hands trembled, and he fisted them to hide it.

"Maybe that hot blond from human resources. I always did like blonds best. Plus, she's got a real job, so we're on the same page, really." He said coldly, staring straight ahead as he stuffed the bags into the back seat. Tenten climbed into the passenger seat, and for the entire ride to Lee's house, they didn't speak a single word.

--

"Tenten...you okay? You're being quiet. That's unlike you." Sakura commented as she watched her brunette friend stand sullenly to the side. She followed her brown eyed gaze to across the living room where a certain coffee-haired man was jeering at Naruto's attempts at playing pool. Tenten heaved a sigh, and grabbed another handful of the crackers she'd picked out only two hours ago, and stuffed them clumsily into her mouth.

"Um foin." She said as she chewed a large moutful of boursin and cracker. Sakura grimaced and glanced worriedly at Sasuke, who shrugged. Ino narrowed her eyes knowingly, and cast a look across the room.

--

"Damn, Neji's meaner than usual." Chouji whispered loudly to Shikamaru. They were standing by the pool table as Naruto and Lee attempted, drunkenly, to play pool. Naruto had scratched the table several times and Lee looked close to emptying the contents of his stomach onto the table, but no one halted either of them, merely for the sake of amusement. Neji was currently standing to the side, drinking and making comments that had long ago passed rude and were now pushing cruel. He had always been unpleasant, but this was just too much. Thank god Naruto and Lee were so involved in their game that they couldn't hear his cutting remarks.

Shikamaru would have pinned it down on the fact that Neji didn't drink often, so being hungover was a novel and especially unpleasant business for him, but the accountant hadn't had that much to drink the night before that the hangover could make him act like this. He glanced at the new secretary, who was rabidly stuffing her face with cheese and crackers and staring after Neji despondently. Neji was obviously not looking at that particular half of the room.

"What we have here is a failure to communicate." Shikamaru joked, although he wasn't _really_ kidding.

Lee stood up from ruining his pool table and announced that it was time for cake. Of course, it was low in calorie and high in antioxidants, as he gleefully pointed out, so it was bound to taste terrible. With a collective sigh, everyone shuffled to the table, awaiting the cake. Ino and Sakura removed the cake from the refrigerator and placed it on the dining room table.

"I just...would like...to make a toast." Naruto drunkenly began, but Sasuke hit him, much to the relief of everyone else in the room. Naruto's toasts were famously unbearable.

"Actually...I would." Tenten spoke up. "I mean, I know I'm half of the reason for all of this, but...I would just like to say that I'm so happy I'm being welcomed into this community...I really feel like I'm moving on with my life." She said, forcing a smile. The speech was obviously painfully rehearsed and everyone fought back a wince as they half-heartedly clapped. The worst part was that she looked suspiciously close to tears. Once again, Neji was doing a stellar job of avoiding looking anywhere near her. "Um...thank you all so much...I don't feel too well all of a sudden." She laughed awkwardly. "I'm going to go home now."

The silence as she gave another high pitched laugh and jogged out of the room was deafening. They watched her leave, and then, everyone looked at Neji.

"What?" He asked finally. Lee glared at him; a most off-putting experience indeed. Ino and Sakura moved in on him, glowering at him like vultures.

"What did you do?" Sakura asked suspiciously. "It's obviously your fault. What did you do?"

All eyes were on him. He glared.

"I don't know what you're talking about. The hell with this; I'm going home."

--

It hurt. Neji lay awake in bed, staring at the ceiling, replaying the scene in the parking lot over and over again, like a video clip. But no matter how many times he relived it, the pain still didn't dissipate.

It was official. His heart was broken. His blood pounded in his ears and he trembled, because it really hurt that much. Fine, maybe he'd hurt her feelings, but she'd get over it. But this? She was the first woman to have ever caught his eye. He would have enumerated the reasons for why falling in love was stupid and pointless, because usually that made him feel better, but tonight he found that the reasons themselves were even more stupid and pointless. He'd _liked _her. The worst part was, he _still_ liked her. And now she hated him.

--


	5. The First Circle of Hell

Love is Not Manly

Author's Note: I am so sorry for last chapter. It was _awful,_ I know, and short, but it needed to be written and my writing muscles were pretty exhausted. I've been producing a lot of writing this summer, and I'm beginning to realize that the quality of writing has been sharply declining because of it. Luckily, I'm now happy with where this story is; I've gotten past the icky part, and now for the fun! The lime-flavored fun, mind you. Heheh yes, this chapter hasa tiny bit of citrus in it, and more to come later! Bwahaha. Anyways, enjoy. I worked hard on this chapter and I hope it's an improvement over the last one.

Chapter Five: The First Circle of Hell

Sunday morning had always, in Neji's mind, been reserved as the time for regrets and embarrassment and general depression. The weekend, at this point, was nearly over, and there was always that sense of panic, that no, it couldn't _possibly_ be over already! feeling. Neji stood in his kitchen, sipping a cup of coffee and staring dismally outside, at the gray, overall shitty winter weather. His mood dropped with every fat, soggy flake, until he was sure that he could not possibly feel any more miserable. On top of that, he was damn exhausted. The entire night he'd lain awake, staring at the ceiling, contemplating the many ways he had, to put it eloquently, fucked up. Guilt and embarrassment consumed him.

Christmas, that abominable holiday, was just a week away, and with it, every year brought the inevitable surrounding absurd festivities. There was the office holiday party, but as with every year, he had no intention of attending that. He always got the invitation and promptly tossed it into the paper shredder next to his desk in his living room. Besides, undoubtedly Tenten would be there, and he felt as though he had no right to ruin yet another aspect of her life. On Saturday, there was also his family's party. This was another event that Neji was less than enthused about going to. Relations with his family had been tense after his father's death, and as Hinata was the much more loved member of the family, he felt uncomfortable being there next to her, just awaiting comparison like a sitting duck. Sure, he had a higher-paying job than Hinata did, but Hinata was sweet, and cute. He, of course, was nothing remotely close to either of these virtues and had always been infamous for his rude disposition. When he was little, he had been favored for his obvious talent in sports and academics, but as he became colder, so did his family's attitude towards him.

Speaking of Hinata, his phone began ringing, and her name popped up on the caller id. Neji sighed before lifting the receiver lackadaisically. Hinata was probably just calling to ask if he was going to the family party this year. He couldn't ignore the phone call; she'd find some other way to pester him.

"Neji-niisan. I'm sorry for calling so early." Her stammer, that so effectively grated on his nerves, filled his ears. Neji wrinkled his nose.

"I'm not going to the family party." He said stiffly, before she could begin stammering about it. Hinata's sigh could be heard.

"That wasn't my main reason for calling." She began. "I just...I called to..."

"Spit it out." He snapped, pinching the bridge of his nose.

"Y-you're an idiot!" She blurted. The silence that followed was of pure and unadulterated shock. Neji pulled the receiver away from his ear to study it in confusion. Had skittish, permanently quiet Hinata just _yelled_ at him? The apocalypse was really coming, this time. "Sorry. It's just, well...Tenten told me what happened...Neji, I have known you a very long time." Her voice regained its quavering, whispery quality.

"Your point?" He drawled, although prickles of anxiety at the mention of Tenten ran over him.

"I-I...I know she hurt your feelings, but she likes you, and you like her, so just...stop it!" She squealed, and Neji could picture her clapping her hands over her mouth, shaking and looking around nervously, waiting for him to pop out of nowhere like a whackamole and kill her. Neji almost smiled at the image. Almost. "I'll see you tomorrow." She finished morosely, and before Neji could slip in a cutting or snide remark, she had hung up on him.

Well. The fact that Hinata had called him on Sunday morning at nine am spoke volumes about how much this had been bothering her. Neji sighed and resumed his gaze out the window. Already, people were driving about, going shopping and getting their houses ready for the Christmas holiday.

Neji faltered. How could Hinata possibly say that Tenten liked him? She obviously _didn't._ But...then again, Hinata _did_ talk to Tenten, and Hinata _had_ always been excessively good at reading people (though he wouldn't dare admit out loud that Hinata was good at something.).

Neji took another contemplative sip of coffee. He had nothing to lose...He had already royally fucked up everything, so much so that it seemed that he couldn't mess up anything any more. He had hurt Tenten's feelings multiple times and made himself look like an idiotic little schoolgirl, and it hadn't gotten him anywhere. He'd secretly spent money on her, and he'd obsessed about her, and failed to complete any work, and then, conversely used work as a way of not thinking about her.

In other words, he had done every single thing _except_ for just tell her how he felt. He liked her, Hinata was right about that. He genuinely liked Tenten. She was smart, unpretentious, kind, and brave. She was virtuous and had her own opinions, but wasn't irritating about it. She was...perfect. He had never met anyone that had captivated him half as much. Furthermore, he had never before respected a woman this much.

This was all fine and dandy, but...how did he tell her? He couldn't do it over the phone, and he wasn't so childish and cowardly as to email her about it. He couldn't tell her at work, because rejection was too humiliating. But...he couldn't just show up at her house...could he?

Neji spent hours contemplating it. Every time he'd thought he'd come up with a solution, he found a reason for why that particular way wouldn't work. But he had to tell her...and even if she didn't like him, at least it was an explanation for his moronic behavior.

And then he found himself doing something absolutely and completely absurd. His manly, before-Tenten self would have sneered and deemed his actions to be those of someone without balls, but he found that calling up Hinata and asking for advice took a lot more courage than not doing it at all.

"This is Neji." He said, swallowing his pride and protests and awkwardness. Automatically, Hinata began on one of her nervous rants.

"I'm sorry I said what I said, I shouldn't have interfered, it's not my place, I just felt--"

"I wanted advice on it." He cut in, rolling his eyes. As usual, Hinata was acting like a silly little twit around him. Really, he had never had any intention of harming her. Making fun of her was merely good sport.

"...O-oh." She responded, clearly confused. Neji clenched his fists, willing himself to not hang up and promptly shoot himself.

"How do I tell her?" He asked in a very small voice. He could very easily see Hinata's smile.

"Well..."

--

Tenten had been feeling awful all morning. First of all, with the exorbitant amount of cheese and crackers she had consumed the night before, she was too afraid to get on the scale like she usually did every morning. This lowered her confidence greatly, and in general made her feel bloated and depressed. She wandered about her house in an enormous sweatshirt and sweatpants, eating cereal straight out of the box and getting crumbs everywhere. She hadn't bothered to wash her makeup off, and so, because of her crying, it trailed little black streaks down her face. Her eyes were puffy and her skin was blotchy. Her hair was tangled beyond reason and would probably take hours to comb out.

In short, she was miserable. She flicked through the channels on the television, hunting for some sort of brainless romantic comedy to quell her nerves. Unfortunately, it seemed romantic comedies weren't generally shown on Sunday afternoons. This put her into a self-righteous rage.

She heaved yet another sigh, and grabbed a handful of chocolate krispies, stuffing it into her mouth and letting stray krispies litter her sweatshirt, lap, and the area around her. She was normally a fairly neat person, but today, her attitude, quite plainly, was "fuck it."

She had never felt so hurt before. He didn't like her. Worse, he had no respect for her. These past few weeks, she had felt so sure that something, something _real_, was developing between them. What about those secret smiles they shared? All the times he touched her when they were laughing? What about all the lunch breaks spent chatting and teasing? Had it all been a ruse? She felt so stupid, like she had been tricked all along. Her pride was hurt, she was embarrassed...and the worst part of all, by far, was that...she still liked him.

Why?! _Why_ did she still have to like that...that asshole?! She hastily shoveled another mouthful of cereal into her mouth, feeling hot tears sting the corners of her eyes yet again. She was just getting ready to let the tears fall yet again...

...when the doorbell rang.

--

Neji tapped out a frantic rhythm against his leg as he walked up the front steps to Tenten's door, Hinata's words of advice ringing in his ears. _Just tell her the absolute essentials. I like you, I'm sorry, I'm an idiot._ That was all he needed to say. He couldn't let any attitude or snarkiness show; he had to be fully and completely apologetic. If she wanted to talk, he had to let her, because he had no right to do or say anything that she didn't want to hear.

It might work, or it might not. It probably wouldn't, he told himself. He couldn't let himself get his hopes too high, he reminded himself. She probably hated his guts, and rightfully so. He'd been an asshole. On multiple occasions,and in great abundance.

With a shaking finger, he rang the doorbell, licking his lips and tapping his foot against the ground nervously. Anxiety roiled in his stomach like bad indigestion; he almost felt like he needed to lie down for a bit. But he forced himself to not run away. He couldn't let himself act like a coward anymore.

Painstakingly slowly, the door opened, and Tenten's blotchy, puffy face poked out of a sliver of open space. She gasped when she saw Neji, standing there awkwardly, looking just as much like hell as she did. She had never seen him without a starched shirt, or with his hair looking so messy, with the snowflakes stuck in his hair and melting. The dark circles under his eyes were much more pronounced than usual, and he didn't stand quite so tall.

It was a small point of pleasure that he looked like such shit too.

"I..." He began, clenching his fists. Tenten didn't shut the door immediately; she was confused as to why he was here. Probably to hurt her, but if she didn't find out for sure, itwould bother her. He met her eyes levelly. "I'm a real moron." He admitted. "Really."

Tenten gaped. That hadn't been what she had been expecting...at all. She stared in shock at him, waiting for him to continue to amaze her. He exhaled hotly, his breath clouding in the air, and pinched the bridge of his nose. Apologies had always been hard for him. He'd had the experience of apologizing once or twice before, and it had been like pulling teeth. The only way this differed was that it was worse. Much worse. He decided against asking to come in, and then continued. "I couldn't tell you I liked you, because I was afraid. It seemed like you were telling me you didn't like me, so..." he hesitated. "My...my feelings were hurt." He said finally. One more time, he looked at her, and stood a bit taller. "I like you." He said evenly.

Pigs were flying somewhere, Tenten was sure of it. She opened the door a tiny bit wider to more properly gape, open-mouthed, at the man standing before her, looking a bit hopeful, a bit scared, and very, very embarrassed. These were the last three words she would have normally associated with Hyuuga Neji, who she had come to know as a person ruled by his pride. But here he was, on her doorstep, apologizing. Oh god, the tears were coming again. Tenten opened her mouth; she wanted to yell at him, she wanted to scream, and tell him off, and make him go away. He'd _hurt_ her, dammit! He didn't _deserve_ her feelings, not in the least.

Neji watched her, the anxiety and fear bubbling up inside of him, the suspense nearly killing him. He kept telling himself to not expect anything, but he couldn't help but hope that maybe, just maybe...

And yet somehow, she found herself crying and slapping him weakly, whimpering something indecipherable. He caught her hand, and held her by the wrist, regarding her nervously. The tension was so tight and thick that he found it more than difficult to breathe. His lungs felt constricted, so he held his breath, beginning to feel dizzy with the combined effect of adrenaline and lack of oxygen.

And then, it ended.

"Oh, screw it." She choked out, giving a watery smile. "I like you too, you asshole." She admitted, laughing a weird, awkward, and probably completely un-sexy gargling sort of laugh.

Neji pulled on her wrist and wrapped his arms around her immediately, holding her up against him tightly. She wrapped her arms around his waist, burying her face into his chest. She could hear his heart doing double time, which made her blush and smile into his shirt. She didn't think he was capable of being nervous. He didn't cease to stun her today, it seemed. Everything felt surreal.

"I suppose I'll have to settle for you as a girlfriend." He fake-sighed, earning a muffled laugh from her. He rested his chin on top of her head, smiling a relieved smile.

They'd finally made it. It had been a long, hectic road, but they were finally, finally together.

Poor Neji. In reality, this was just the beginning.

--

"Y-you mean it!? They _admitted _it?!" Kiba asked, with all the shock as though Naruto had told him that he was moving to Antarctica to live with penguins for the rest of his life. Naruto nodded, just as wide-eyed.

"That's _so_ romantic..." Ino gushed, sighing deeply. Almost immediately, her eyes narrowed. "But Neji's still a jerk." She added dryly. Hinata frowned.

"That's not true...he just doesn't know how to show he cares!" She protested. Naruto took this opportunity to wrap an arm around Hinata.

"That's my girl, always seeing the silver lining in every cloud!" He boomed lovingly. Kiba bristled.

"Your girl!? Uh, last time I checked, Hinata was definitely _not_ dating _you_..." He sneered, but Naruto was already waxing philosophical on the trials and tribulations of love, life, and the universe. Ino rolled her eyes, but then lit up. She had an idea.

"So..." she began slyly. "How long do you think it'll last?" She said in a stage whisper. Kiba snorted.

"A week. They'll be over by Christmas." He said confidently, crossing his arms and nodding. Naruto glared.

"Hey, have a little faith, dog-breath. ...Two weeks." He added thoughtfully. Ino chuckled evilly, but it was eclipsed by Sasuke as he entered the lounge.

"What's your bet, Bastard?" Naruto called. Sasuke stopped to lean in the doorway.

"Marriage." He said shortly. Everyone began laughing hysterically.

"Come on, this is _Neji_ we're talking about!" Ino said. Sasuke glowered at her.

"When you talk, all I hear is blah blah blah." He said pointedly. Ino reddened in fury.

"Why you..."

"Now now, break it up. Sasuke's entitled to his opinion. What about you, Hinata-chan?" Naruto ruffled Hinata's hair. She looked like she might die simultaneously of ecstasy and embarrassment.

"I..." She looked around the room, her opal eyes darting around nervously. She swallowed. "...I think...marriage too." She said finally. Kiba rolled his eyes.

"You guys have way too much faith in that jerk."

"We'll see..." Hinata said nervously.

--

Neji locked the door to his office, grinning in anticipation. He turned around to face his girlfriend, who was now leaning against his desk, the look of the devil in her eye.

Yes, his girlfriend. Neji warmed at the phrase as he looked at Tenten, appreciating, as usual, how she looked in those tiny black businesslike skirts. Some people used their lunch breaks to work or eat, but Neji and Tenten couldn't help but use the hour for more..._recreational_ purposes. It was only Monday; they'd been dating for twenty four hours now, but everything having been forgiven, it was difficult for them to contain themselves. Neji walked across the room to Tenten and smiled as he leaned forward, pressing her to the desk and simultaneously pressing a kiss to her neck. Her pulse fluttered underneath his lips as he felt her small fingers undoing the knot in his tie. With a rustle of fabric it fell to the floor.

"Hopefully no one thinks you're working right now." She said breathlessly as she undid the buttons on his shirt. Neji snickered and lifted her up onto his desk, hastily pushing away the few things he had on it. He moved in between her legs, resting his hands on her thighs and moving to kiss her lips. Tenten sighed and slipped her hands into his hair, pulling him closer.

"Thank god for locks and blinds." He said honestly, his hand snaking around her waist and pressing against the small of her back, his fingers untucking her shirt from her skirt, and then slipping between the two to draw little circles against her warm skin. She tilted her head back as he began to kiss her jawline, then her throat. Her hands moved from his hair to his neck, and then slung around his shoulders, pulling them even closer together. The contact was delicious. Tenten gasped when his hand moved to her thigh again, pushing her skirt up. Already, their faces were becoming flushed from the activity. Neither had realized just how badly they had wanted to do this until it had become an option--

and then, that hateful sound. Tenten had never hated the sound of a knock on the door quite so much. Neji growled, eying a coffee mug as he considered hurling it at the door, but then broke away from Tenten. His tie was on the floor and his shirt was mostly unbuttoned. Lipstick was smeared on his mouth and cheeks, and his hair was well beyond tousled, but he forgot this—until he opened the door.

"O-oh. I'm...uh...crap. Just...uh...never mind." Kiba was blushing like mad, rubbing the back of his neck, and glimpsed Tenten behind Neji trying to pull her blouse back on. He spied Neji's appearance, and began backing away. "Uh...meeting...ten minutes...um...sorry, sorry, really sorry..." he backed away and then began running, tripping over people and other assorted hallway-related impediments.

Neji pinched the bridge of his nose and slammed his door shut. Tenten smiled sheepishly.

"So much for that." She sighed. Neji cracked his knuckles and inwardly swore a slow, painful death for Kiba, once he'd gone to the meeting. But first...he had to figure out how to make himself appear presentable. He looked down. He'd also have to take care of that in ten minutes too.

Fucking hell.

Then he remembered he'd wanted to ask Tenten about something. He'd wanted to ask in the "afterglow" because she'd eb more likely to oblige then, but this would have to do for now, seeing as he had to give her fair warning.

"On Sunday is my extended family's Christmas party. You're coming." He ordered, running his hands through his hair in a poor attempt to make himself look more like an accountant and less like a guy getting some. Tenten tried to help him, but he dodged her; it would only make things worse if she touched him.

"Oh really now?" She asked, raising her eyebrows as she re-buttoned her blouse. Neji slipped his tie around his neck and began knotting it again.

"Yes. Hinata will be there, don't worry. They're not all mean like I am." He said cheekily, and found himself winking at her. Tenten burst out laughing, and he let himself sappily admire her rosy cheeks and sparkly eyes.

"Fine, fine. We'll talk later—you're going to be late for the meeting!" She shooed him out of his office, but stopped him in the doorway, gripping him by his tie. She grinned evilly before giving him a light peck on the cheek.

Neji stumbled out of his office in a daze, and somehow made it to the conference room, though he wasn't entirely sure of how it had happened. He couldn't stop the silly grin from forming on his normally angry face, and he decided to not bother trying.

He had a girlfriend. He and Tenten were dating. She was his _woman_, and he didn't plan on letting her go. With a chuckle to himself, he entered the meeting room.

--


End file.
